Psychological Character Origins.

I'm taking a break from working on my story to write a little bit about my character's origins. The moment their seeds first took root in my conscious mind. I guess I was reflecting on teenage memories in my drive to IFF this morning. Maybe it's why I enjoy driving Lisa to work in the morning, its a magical time I've often ignored in favor of sleep.

So where did Lucius come from?

I think he came from the same place as classic super heroes like superman - from the imagination of a teenager aspiring to be something more than his awkward, uncertain self. I mentioned this to Lisa and she said it has nothing to do with age, and she's right. She created Damona in her 20's as a reflection of her teenage alter ego, whose life she kind of lived rather than fantasized about. My own process was a projection of a character whom, later in life, I unconsciously grew into. Not that I am that character, but he was the benchmark of an ideal along the way. And that's what this is about. We create characters to fulfill our psychological need to grow beyond our conscious limits. Take my dear friend Chris for example. He is very shy and admits to being socially awkward once in a while. In my game he created the character of Felix, who possesses all the social grace and assertive will he lacks in everyday life. When he becomes Felix, he leaves Chris and his world behind and takes a heroic aura. Perhaps it's why he is such a great role player. He enjoys the power of being someone stronger than his ordinary persona. When his wife calls him while he is gaming, he get's frustrated because she's unwittingly calling back to his ordinary life. I wish he could consciously bring the strength of Felix with him everywhere, especially at work. But that's another matter.

My first vision of this character was as clear as any other vision today. In hindsight, I may have been influenced by Disney's Fantasia, a childhood favorite. Unlike Mickey Mouse, however, the wizard I saw didn't lose control of his powers. In the fall of 1998, in my eleventh grade English class, I saw a powerful wizard on a stormy mountaintop commanding the elements. Lucius had no fear or faith in anything outside of himself. Instead he had a strong will, wisdom and confidence. He was a wizard, in the way I saw the quintessential artist as a wizard. I was heavily influenced by Leonardo's writing at the time, particularly the artist's endeavor to master himself and the world around him, to understand all things, to become the Universal Man. I saw the ancient artist as a real-life Merlin, a basis for Lucius' “Merlinnesque” master in the Wizard's Wrath. Concepts like “Man as a measure of all things” became a foundation for mastering chaotic forces which threatened to break the world of lesser men. Not to mention the implication of reality and consciousness as subjective experiences.

Most importantly, his confidence was what I needed the most in that time of my life as an awkward teenager from a foreign country. His devotion to magic became my devotion to art. He grew as an idealized alter-ego sometimes close, sometimes far in many crossroads in my life. Before his conception in 98, I used the name Lucius in the first iteration of Claudio's game the year before. I had cast him as a knight fighting for the typical justice freedom and you-know-what. That same character became the first Lucius Maximus in World of Warcraft - the alter ego through which Lisa first met me. His first appearance in Wizard's Wrath 1 was a puzzle to me. I really wasn't sure if I wanted to play as a paladin or a mage. Now I see the meaning behind the divide. Lucius the mage was my individual will going against conventions of my Christian upbringing, while the paladin was a champion of pious spiritual aspirations.

I haven't been playing any kind of paladin-like character for a while, so Lisa asked me if it's because I resent that period of my life as a Christian. I had to think about that for a little while. My immediate answer was this: “The wizard gave me a wider perspective of the world, I still love paladins and their devotion, but would rather command them, than to be them.” In truth, as I see Lucius' character growing as I write the story, I see him as an evolving assimilation of separate aspects of my self. My understanding of the world grows into a more wholesome view of magic and spirituality, it's only fair that my characters should grow as well.

The important point to take from all this is that our characters shouldn’t just be idle make believe, or escapist flights from the real world. They should inspire us to grow as well rounded individuals, not caricatures of ourselves. I'm asking Lisa to write her own point of view on this character creation process, I can't wait to read hers.